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How to beat social phobia fast

2021.03.16 08:58

There are phobias, such as social phobia, which, more than others, constitute real handicaps. At the very least, for those who suffer from it. Thus, the question of the treatment of social phobia arises. The same goes for erotophobia (phobia) ))) of blushing) or fear of speaking in public (glossophobia) is part of it. Same sentence and the same punishment for laxophobia (fear of diarrhea) or, in another social register, before raphobia (fear of crowds).

Each of these phobias has its share of psycho-social consequences, each more painful than the other. It is sometimes appalling for the people who are victims of it. Most of them cannot envisage any social, emotional, or professional activity.

I will have a rather breathtaking example of this on the day of Lionel's first consultation. He tells me he has social phobia. When the latter call me to make an appointment, I hear a thin voice, as if very distant, almost erased. No He does this very often during our consultations. Like when he phones me to ask me for details about exercises that I entrust to him. Presumably, this is confirmed. Lionel has a social phobia. He is looking for the most suitable treatment for social phobia ..

Definition of social phobia

Social phobia, or social anxiety, is an inability to relate to others, to all others, in all areas of one's life. The person affected by this phobia experiences intense pain when interacting with others. For example, saying hello and buying a baguette at the bakery is particularly difficult and, in some cases, impossible.

People who are victims of social phobia and desperate for social phobia treatment find it difficult to face others' gaze. Almost permanently, they fear the judgment of others. They are always afraid of doing wrong or expressing inappropriate things at the most inopportune times. From a lack of self-esteem.

Isolated most of the time, they feel a very strong sense of insecurity. The only haven of peace they find is usually where they live. This has the effect of isolating them even more, nourishing their social phobia even more, and making more delicate social phobia treatment likely to suit them.

Often taken care of by psychiatrists, they are prescribed many drugs (anxiolytics, hypnotics, anti-depressants, neuroleptics) to treat social phobia.

The uselessness of drugs to treat social phobia

In all the clinical cases related to a social phobia that I have dealt with over the years, few people have told me that they have benefited from it. As I often write in this blog, this type of medication only alleviates the symptoms-and again , I am far from convinced --and in no way solves the problem of social phobia. Therefore, drugs are not a treatment for social phobia.

It is not uncommon for people with social phobia to cultivate very low self-esteem. They also conceive a strong shame and very strong guilt about their inability to live like the others. They suffer terribly from their social phobia and are very often convinced that they are responsible for failing where most others do. As for what they think is a normal life, many admit that they don't know what a normal life is.

First of all, because they don't see many people or even no one, or because, more precisely, it is the idea that they have of a normal life, in contrast to social phobia.

Family history explains social anxiety

I have always been struck to observe that these people who have social phobia and social anxiety come from so-called dysfunctional families who had participated, directly or indirectly, in preventing the phobic from taking risks,'' prevent asserting himself by sending him more often than not a damaged image in the genre:

"Do what you want since you won't be able to do it!". Now it is true that all families are dysfunctional by nature. Otherwise, there would be no neurosis and even less anxiety neurosis.

Social phobia is, therefore, a symptom. The symptom of deep anxiety, even of chronic anxiety, which, over time, has become generalized anxiety.

In all of these emotional and psychological circumstances, even worse as I will now demonstrate to you, Lionel first entered my Telehealth Psychiatry Services and how he was thus able to access personalized treatment for social phobia.https://kentuckymentalhealth.com/telehealth-psychiatry-services/

Social Phobia: A Pathogenic Personal History

When Lionel introduces himself to me, I meet a man who seems to me to be hurt. He looks almost sickly, his head on his shoulders, and he is dressed in a white and gray woolen jacket that gives the impression that he stole it from a giant!

Lionel seems embarrassed to be there. Are these the premises of his social phobia? He will soon start to apologize because he is packing his little things around him. He dwells on the correct positioning of the bag he was carrying over the shoulder. The size He takes the time to wedge it in the back of his seat and then gives me an embarrassed smile that reveals damaged teeth. He is unshaven, which, on his livid complexion, makes him look even grayer.

For an hour, Lionel will be busy trying to answer my questions about his social phobia symptoms. We will talk; he will often tell me that he does not understand what I say to him and sometimes less the questions that I ask him.

Intelligence is a brake on the treatment of social phobia

During the next two consultations, I would understand that I did not have to question my questioning him and the quality of my practice. Lionel will explain to me later that he just wanted to make sure he understood what I was talking to him while thinking about the meaning (s) of my questions and, incidentally, where I was going about his social phobia.

Because the guy is intelligent! And not only is he intelligent, even very intelligent, since he handles with a certain skill second-degree humor, ridicule, and even Cynicism about him and his social phobia.

Regarding this last point, as Benoit Poelvoorde said: "… Cynicism is the accentuated form of despair…". The fact remains that Lionel is wary. And he has something to be wary of.

He has every reason to feel anxious about this first therapeutic interview. Lionel wants to get out of his social phobia, it's not easy for him, and the treatment of social phobia he is looking for is even more important.

Social phobia: Empirical diagnoses

For years, Lionel has been walked from one shrink to another, from one psychiatrist to another. No one seems to agree on a diagnosis. However, none of them evoke a possible social phobia. Sometimes psychotic, sometimes borderline, sometimes schizophrenic, sometimes bi -polar, sometimes hospitalized in a psychiatric hospital, Lionel is wandered like a terra incognita tourist.

Lionel has it all. At the same time, he has nothing. But he still has something. Affection. But which? Professionals seem unable to comment. They, therefore, prescribe acts accordingly. He will be hospitalized on various occasions. Against his will But, who cares about Lionel's opinion when he claims a social phobia?

It all started years ago, following a very violent altercation between Lionel and his mother's lover. Warning: any interpretation regarding a possible rivalry would be a misdiagnosis. One more!

This lover seemed to express a certain contempt for his companion's son. She seemed to let go for years with all the more ease since she always considered that her child was somewhat ill and could not be autonomous and even less responsible. Therefore, in the sense of the mother, he would have needed to be coached by a referent adult male… The lover…

Social phobia: A destructive family context

Having been treated for years for depression and not benefiting from treatment for the social phobia he is a victim of, Lionel presented the family context to me as a rather destructive environment between a castrating mother and an absent father.

The mother, who will always refuse to come and talk to me, seemed to have worked hard to prevent her son from evolving, from leaving the nest, presenting him as a puny child who had to be protected from himself and from the world (this reminds me of the story of a young patient to whom her mother had always told to be wary of men because they are all bastards, perverts and… rapists).

Lionel will tell me about his school difficulties. Not that he was a bad student, but more of his great difficulty in forming relationships with classmates, he who always remained alone in a corner as if hidden, sheltered from all, in addition to often doing the object of mockery, jokes as Lionel likes to say. Another field of expression of social phobia.

It was shortly after his last hospitalization that Lionel decided to come and consult me. We have implemented a progressive strategy to save him from his social phobia. It was hard, I would almost go so far as to say laborious, but Lionel courageously held on . And it worked!

The causes of social phobia

Social phobia, like any phobia, or symptom of anxiety, responds to specific mechanisms. Together we will explore some of them. Each cause of social phobia responds to the following factors:

• Perfection

• Autonomy

• Assertiveness

• Prevention of relapse

Social phobia: Stop wanting to be perfect

After we took stock of his situation's background, I started by asking Lionel to think about just two questions about his social phobia. When he consulted me for the second time, the questions had been the subject of several such answers that it will take us a Lionel had worked to answer in a way so precise and detailed that it posed all the mechanical difficulty of his problem but, above all, brought to light all that took part in taking the risk of having a positive image of him. This will be foundational for the further implementation of strategic actions that I wanted to put in place.

In the meantime, Lionel called me very often or sent me text messages. He explained how much he was anxious, even anxious at the idea of ​​not doing precisely what I asked him to do. I would spend a lot of time telling Lionel and repeating And that, as long as he wanted to strive for this behavioral perfection, he would get off with anxiety disorders and other repeated anxieties, like his social phobia.

Social phobia: How to become independent

The sessions passed, two then three, then four. The therapeutic atmosphere was frankly relaxed, which allowed me to ask Lionel what he would like to do if he had a positive image of him and if he felt sufficiently confident and secure. After thinking about At the same time, he explained that his mother was probably trying to prevent him from leaving. In doing so, Lionel agreed that his mother was in his logic. And sterile to try to change her mind.

So I asked Lionel to think about the means he could find to lay the foundations for his autonomy, marking the end of his social phobia. I had made it clear to Lionel that I did not want him to take an apartment too quickly. I wish He were looking for ways to qualify for the rental of real estate. At the same time, knowing how difficult it is for him since he has no income. In addition to disabled worker status. And allowances that do not allow him to claim anything about a place to live.

Treatment of social phobia: A personalized strategy

Sometimes we communicate using certain social networks. I appreciate the humor and the ridicule he shows towards her. He succeeded in taking part in an active process to learn to be secure and to regain self-confidence.

Finally, Lionel is living proof that it is not by using rational methods that this is solved. Some shrinks have told him for too long that it was enough to convince yourself not to take into account what people might think. Easy to say and completely inept therapeutically.

This patient did not purposely have social phobia. Not on purpose to be afraid of others. He is also not responsible for not having received treatment for a social phobia that suits him. It was his reality. People, like repeated events, took it upon themselves to convince him. Make him believe that he is unable to behave normally and be independent.

Today, I know that Lionel is convinced that the future belongs to him. That he has to take it slow. Not to ask for more than he can take. Lionel knows what to do when things go wrong or stumbles on something. It is enough For him to reuse all or part of the exercises that we have used. Use your treatment of social phobia so that situations are unblocked. One day at a time.

Social phobia: Turning a problem into a solution

"life is a succession of problems". He was quite right. In this more or less continuous series of problems, we try to adapt to solve them. It is the fruit of our respective realities. This is exactly what Lionel did not know how He, therefore, learned to appropriate his treatment of social phobia and thus no longer suffer. Like, everyone! By finding a solution to his problem of social phobia, has Lionel become a normal, almost banal man?