Is it possible to live without lying

If everybody is happy because of these lies, then we should certainly use them whenever necessary. But we of course must not over-ice the cake by laying on flattery with a trowel, so indiscrimite and fulsome, that it is not believable. Everyone likes praise, but we know instinctively when it is overdone and unmerited.

Flattery is an attempt to delude people for some persol gain and it does not do a mite of good to anybody. Very few persons may succumb to flattery, as most people know their limitations and get annoyed with exaggerated or insincere praise.

I very well know my own limitations and I know that when people praise me to the sky, they are only trying to insult my intelligence with blatant lies. Nobody can bamboozle a sensible person with flattery and hence it should be avoided.

Actually very few of us tell black lies in deliberate contradiction to truth. But between the white and black, there is a dangerous area of grey lie. It cannot be detected by anyone but ourselves, and only by searching our own conscience can we know whether our standards of honesty have slipped a little. So it is between me and my conscience to decide whether the headache I have is a genuine reason for breaking my promise to a friend to accompany her to the dentist.

And there are times, when the truth goes by default, times when I should have spoken, but did not. Sometimes it happens that something discreditable is said about someone whom I know very well.

I may also know that the remark against the person is completely unfair and unjustified, but still do not speak up in contradiction, as I do not want to fall out with other persons present or introduce a prickly tone to the party. That kind of remark need not offend anybody. I think that it is very wrong to keep quiet when some disparaging remark is made against somebody whom I know to be a very nice person and when I know that the remark against her is unjust.

But we often maintain silence because of the feeling that by supporting the person against whom the discreditable remarks were levelled, we may antagonize the persons indulging in the gossip of unfair criticism. I myself often remain silent in such situations, though I know it to be wrong and cowardly. I suppose that to keep up good relations, we often gratify the gossips by compliance with their wishes. But it is a wrong policy and I know it very well. I also know that these kinds of silent lies are vicious and despicable.

But some lies are not only harmless, but they are extremely necessary as well. Take this incident. The other day I was talking to a lady who had come to visit me.

A young girl, the daughter of a friend came to see me at that time. She often does that at any odd time—sometime on her way back from the school or on her way to the market, apparently to have some titbits like a slice of home-made cake or a biscuit, as she often tells me with a smile.

She is a very charming girl, though plump, may be fifteen or sixteen years old. That day she came to visit me on her way back from the school. She looked jubilant and said that she had been dieting for several weeks and she believed that she had shed some of her fat.

Apparently some of her school friends had told her that she was looking decidedly slim. But I did not know how to say the unpleasant truth. I see you same as before. But keep up your dieting.

May be, it would do well some day. It was the truth of course—a bitter truth. The girl blushed to the root of her hair and her eyes glistened with unshed tears.

She turned and left abruptly without a word. I really felt very sad for the young girl. Look how she has left without saying anything to us. What manners! I looked at the lady in wonder. Did not she realize how hurt and sad the girl looked? And the fault was entirely hers. I told her tactfully that the girl was very young and felt very hurt at her disillusionment.

I think the movie works from the idea that the omission of truth is itself a lie. A bigger problem for the movie is that there appears to be no mental illness. I always thought the really dangerous people were the true believers. Information Goods, Intellectual Property. Life Without Lies 7. Categories: Information Goods, Intellectual Property. At the top of the list: 1. GabbyD Mar 8 at am. Kurbla Mar 8 at am. B Riley Mar 8 at am. And while every situation is different, consider asking yourself whether honesty in a situation like this would truly benefit the other person—or simply be a distraction, according to Levine.

Mild and well-intentioned deception can be even more beneficial in distant relationships, says Levine. Close relationships, on the other hand, can give way to more of an appreciation for honesty, she says, and confessing to friends is likely not as bad as you think. Contact us at letters time. By Cassie Shortsleeve. Related Stories. America Needs to Get Back to Facts.

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