📕「使命と魂のリミット」の感想📗

最初から最後まで、引き込まれて読んでしまいました。これはネタバレありの感想文です。

ただ一つ疑問なのが、穣治くんはとても思いやりがあり賢い男性なのに、なぜああいう行動に出てしまったのか、ということです。あんなことで仇が討てると思うような人ではないはずなのに、亡くなった恋人のために何かしなければいられなかったから、犯行に及んだのでしょうか。それほど喪失感が大きかった、ということなのだと思いますが、それなら望との出会いによって、自分の考えが間違っていることに途中で気づかなかったのだろうか、とも思いました。気づいてはいたけれど、一度決めたことをやり遂げることこそが、元恋人への愛を貫くことだったのかもしれませんが……。

少し無理やりな展開にも感じました。たとえ愛する人を失った原因が島原にあると思ったとしても、愛する人はもう戻ってこない。そして今、自分のことを思ってくれる女性がいて、自分自身もそれを幸せだと感じているのなら、思いとどまってほしかった。けれど、それではこの物語は続かないのですよね。

最後には彼が気づくのだから、この話はこれでよかったのだろうな、と思います。

あと、少し気になるのは、西園先生がかっこよすぎることです。言い訳をせず、受け入れられるまで待つ姿勢。なかなかできることではありません。最後に体調が悪くなるまで頑張る姿も、実際にあそこまでできるのだろうかと思ってしまいました。同じ病気ではありませんが、病人の立場としては、その前に悪化する体調に意識が引きずられる時間があると思うので、それを超えて「心頭滅却すれば火もまた涼し」の境地に達するのだろうかと、少し疑問に感じました。私はそこまで頑張ったことはないし、その前に倒れてしまうと思うので、そのあたりに少し違和感があります。

でも、それでもとても面白い作品でした。

Thoughts on “Mission and the Limit of the Soul”

I was completely drawn into this story from beginning to end.What follows contains spoilers.

One thing that kept bothering me is this: Joji is such a kind and intelligent man, so why did he end up making the choices he did?He doesn’t seem like someone who would truly believe that such an act could bring justice or revenge. And yet, perhaps he felt he had to do something for the woman he lost, and that desperate need pushed him into committing the crime.It must have been an overwhelming sense of loss—but even so, I wondered whether meeting Nozomi should have made him realize, at some point, that what he was doing was wrong.Maybe he did realize it, but felt that carrying through with what he had decided was the only way he could remain faithful to the love he had for his former girlfriend.

Still, part of it felt a little forced to me.Even if he believed that Shimabara was responsible for the tragedy, his beloved would never come back. And now there was someone who cared about him, someone he himself felt happy with—I wanted him to stop.But of course, if he did, the story could not continue.

Since he finally comes to realize the truth in the end, I suppose this is the right way for the story to be.

Another small thing that stood out to me is how almost too admirable Dr. Nishizono is.He never makes excuses, and he waits patiently until he is accepted—something that is not easy to do. And in the end, he keeps pushing himself until his health worsens. I wondered whether anyone could really do that.Although I do not have the same illness, as someone who has been sick, I know how easily your attention is taken over by the decline of your physical condition. I questioned whether it is really possible to reach a state of mind like “mind over matter” in such a situation.I know I could not; I would collapse before that. That was the one part that felt a little unrealistic to me.

Still, despite all that, I found the story deeply engaging and very enjoyable.