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2020.05.26 13:38


Adventure; directed by - Denis Villeneuve; Cast - Timothée Chalamet; Country - Canada

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Please don’t judge me! I am ashamed, believe me. I grew up reading books daily. I had a speech problem. To help correct it, my mother would have me read aloud. Which helped greatly in high school when teachers would pick a random child to read a passage. Confidence was important. But that’s not what this post is about. In 2008 my sister got me to watch and read Twilight. (This is where part of the shame is. ) I enjoyed it greatly. It wasn’t even close to the genre I usually read. My last book I read before my great shame was Duna Key. Creepy book but great non the less. Anyways after reading all the books. I was rather dissatisfied with the ‘sex’ scene. I wrote a little scene on MySpace for my sister to read. (Yes, I said MySpace. ) My sister then referred me to fanfiction website. I instantly became hooked. Die hard angst fan. Weekly updates. Reading a chapter with 10k+ words. I couldn’t stop reading. And because the movies were still being made for a bit afterwards, the fanfics kept pouring in with new love hate relationships and much needed sex scenes. Fast forward to about 2012. I got tired of crappy fanfics. Not edited, bad writing. The back stabbing of 50 Shades of Grey. I was done with Fics. So I tried to read new books. But every book I read reminded me of some form of fan fiction. EVERY DAY BOOK. So I stopped reading. For a really long time. A few months ago I came across a BBC mini series on Netflix called North and South. I love period pieces greatly. (When my husband and I renew our vows it will be a theme wedding. ) Anyway I became in love with North and South. I’ve watched it at least 50 times by now. I don’t know why either. It has taught me a lot. Well guess what. It was first a book. Of course it was. Here is my chance to redeem myself. Let’s read some classic literature and fix my stupid fan fiction ways. So for my birthday I was gifted North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell. My birthday was a month ago. Yes it has taken me that long to read it. Give me a break I’m a bit out of practice! A couple disappointing features of the book vs the show: The great meeting between Miss Hale and Mr. Thornton. Now this didn’t bother me too much. My husband was disappointed. One of his favorite parts in the movie is “I saw ya”. He will yell this at our kids. The ending. Obviously it is at a time where a man and woman shouldn’t really touch or engage until marriage. I get it. But I was dissatisfied with the intimacy. But that’s the problem. I am completely unsatisfied by the book. I think it’s because of freaking fan fiction. I need more. I need gentle touches and secret kisses. I’m a fool. You know what worse. I will not read real smut either. I can’t dare to buy a book just about sex. I don’t know why. Maybe from embarrassment. Maybe because I was taught that wasn’t real reading. I am ashamed. I am disappointed in myself. I started off so strong. And now I just can’t. I really am not sure at this point what the point of this post anymore. Maybe I’m seeking help. Or approval of shitty fan fiction as a book. Maybe even recommendations that will help me past this hump, that may also into a decent hump as well. I am sorry this is so long. Thanks for sticking with me if you’ve gotten this far. Thanks for taking the time out to read.

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My own take on "The Martian" challenge from reddit. I originally wanted to go to Duna and do a proper Martian challenge, but since I have never sent a manned expedition to Laythe before I decided to go there instead. Luckily Laythe has no heavy storms, so the mission went according to plan, and all six kerbonauts returned home all at the same time. They documented the journey for everyone to see. I was inspired to make the video from watching the Constellation mission by Katateochi, and also from The Martian movie itself (never read the book. I apologize if this is blasphemy), as well as from every amazing creation that has been posted on this subreddit. This whole thing too me perhaps four weeks from when I first started designing crafts to go to Duna, and slowly evolved into a much bigger project that finally reached its completion today. I hope you enjoy, and I will try to answer any questions that you might have.

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